SLAMMING DOORS

The slam of the door is the storm inside that often goes unspoken. Though the sound lasts only seconds, it sits on one’s mind like a chaotic drum beat.

We all have unique sets of circumstances in our lives while on the path to following our dreams be it in the career or academic sphere. For some people the path may pan out, but for most, the path can be challenging and unexpected. However, the experience is often more rewarding and enlightening. I recently had a conversation with one of my childhood friends and as we delved deep into it, we touched on rejection. “I don’t take rejection too well; it’s almost personal to me” he said, as he highlighted his experience chasing his dream of working as an Engineer at one of the largest telecommunications provider in the country. After a number of attempts, despite his qualifications, the door was slammed on his applications. However, after a while of feeling frustrated by it, he came to the realization that maybe it wasn’t meant to be; more opportunities came knocking, he is now learning, growing and doing better at his current firm.

This conversation opened me up to my own experiences too; I mean, I laughed so hard when he mentioned that rejection is almost personal to him, because this has been me. I have experienced a reasonable share of rejection even when I was confident enough that everything was great. I’ve always been one to go so hard for what I believe in and the moment I hit a wall or take an L, the impact is just as hard. In that moment my core is shaken and it almost feels like my world is crashing down. On a number of instances, my initial reaction was denial; I would find my mind unable to rest until I establish a logical explanation for the rejection because more often than not, thorough feedback may not be provided.

Well, most of us have been there, the dreaded rejection email, letter or phone call and the after effect of that slammed door. It is never an easy experience, particularly if you’ve faced several rejections so far in the chase for your dream career, study or project, just to name a few, it can be easy to feel dejected and disheartened. If you have performed to the best of your ability, prepared for an interview, client pitch, study essays, displayed your relevant expertise and demonstrated your competencies but was still turned down; you can take comfort from knowing that there’s little else you could have done, that maybe it wasn’t for you and a better opportunity awaits.  Your confidence can take a hit but work hard at keeping your morale and motivation levels afloat.

Through slamming doors, at the very least I have made a conscious decision to always manage rejection or a loss by picking on the lessons learnt from the experience. It’s not an easy process of growth but is obviously necessary in pushing forward with a fresh perspective. If you encounter unending rejection then use it as a means for developing resilience. Remember, overanalyzing can drive you insane, truth is, soaking in your own disappointment only serves to keep you stuck in the past while taking so much energy away from you in the present that you need to recharge, pick yourself up, and forge forward to take on a dream opportunity.

It’s okay to take time out as you process the wave before approaching a new opportunity, however, use this time to build up your self-confidence and a positive mind-set. But also ensure that you also take action to better yourself while remaining true to your personality and experience.


Written By: Dorcas Waringa | 29/04/2020